For our 11th anniversary, Husband and I went out for a lovely meal at Bondir, Jason Bond's farmhouse-chic restaurant in Inman Square, Cambridge. By mid-meal, Husband and I were engaged in a semi-heated discussion about the definition of stubbornness. Husband likes to call me stubborn and I like to take it as a compliment.
Him: Stubbornness is not a compliment. It has a negative connotation.
Me: Yes, but in certain circumstances it can serve you well. Like if you're working against the odds to get something done. If you don't possess a certain amount of stubbornness, you give up long before it takes to succeed.
Him: No, that's persistence. That's different.
Me: They both come from the exact same place.
Him: Persistence is a positive trait and stubbornness is bad.
Me: You can't have one without the other.
Him: They're two different sides of a coin.
Me: Then we agree. Two sides of the same coin.
Him: You are so stubborn.
Me: Thank you!
Him: It's not a compliment! Do you remember your donkey at the Grand Canyon?
Me: Of course I remember that fucking donkey. Trinity was his name. He kept stopping to munch on the desert grass on the edge of the steep switchbacks, then he'd get way behind and have to sprint to catch up. Donkeys can't sprint. He nearly heaved me into the canyon a dozen times.
Him: See? That's stubbornness. Not persistence.
Me: I'm sure that donkey has triumphed over adversity many a time and now he's retired in Mexico.
Him: Do you see how stubborn you are? I'm going to see if the chef has a dictionary.
Me: Oooooo, a dictionary! I'm sooooo scared!
Him: You refuse to acknowledge I'm right.
Me: But we agree. Stubbornness can be good if you trace it back to its root.
Him: We don't agree!
Do you see any irony here? Any irony at all?
You two are good for each other. Happy Anniversary!!
Posted by: MidLifeMama/Michele | August 17, 2011 at 11:01 AM
How lucky to celebrate at Bondir! Great spot... and be sure to go there in the winter. The fireplace is wonderfully cozy.
Posted by: Julia | August 17, 2011 at 12:16 PM
I like it. A lot. If you weren't stubborn how could you possibly have lasted 11 years? haha
Happy anniversary!!
Posted by: April was in CT now CA | August 17, 2011 at 01:00 PM
Happy Anniversary!
My sisters and I are super incredibly stubborn and damn proud of it. We claim it's because we're Polish.
Posted by: NancyB | August 17, 2011 at 04:49 PM
You guys were made for each other tammy. Happy anniversary! I have had my eye on Bondir ... how was it?
Posted by: sarah | August 18, 2011 at 09:18 AM
Happy Anniversary! Suggestion for Husband: Start using the word "mulish" and see if Tammy still considers it a compliment.
Posted by: PJ | August 18, 2011 at 04:39 PM
The first time I read this I thought you wrote "James Bond's restaurant." I envisioned the chef parkouring off of the roof being pursued by waiters as part of the pre-dessert entertainment. But then I read again ... happy anniversary! Another funny post.
Posted by: Susanna | August 21, 2011 at 04:49 PM
Good to see that DH and I are not the only people who have arguments during their anniversary dinners :) Happy 11th. Still remember how beautiful you looked on the big day. :)
Posted by: Ernie | August 27, 2011 at 01:00 PM