So, about Thanksgiving. We had a great time with my in-laws’ family in the greater Worcester area, with lots of great food and too many laughs to count. However, the morning leading up to the big event was a little chaotic.
It started with smoke. Lots of it. Sudden, thick plumes of smoke coming from our kitchen aren’t necessarily unheard of around the holidays, but at the time they appeared, I wasn’t cooking anything at all. I was in the shower, in fact. I emerged from the bathroom to find myself engulfed in smoke of the electrical sort and to hear Husband make the casual observation that something might be burning. Might, I shrieked? Then, I pounced on the children.
Me: Kids, get your coats on.
Them: Why? Why?
Me: SMOKE! Put your coats on now.
Them: Why? I don’t want to.
Me: FIRE! Put your shoes on.
Them: Fire? Where, Mommy? I don’t want my shoes.
Me: SMOKE!! FIRE!! STOP, DROP, AND ROLL! PUT YOUR GODDAMNED COATS ON!!!
Clearly, we need to practice fire drills. I dragged them coatless and shoeless out the door, dialing 911 with my teeth, while Husband tried to locate the source of the smoke and debated with himself whether or not this situation really qualified as an emergency. Meanwhile, we arrived at our neighbor’s doorstep, me in my wet hair, granny bathrobe, kitchen clogs, and, inexplicably, one black stocking pulled up to the knee. In the reflection of the storm door, I caught a glimpse of what I’m going to look like 30 years from now, and the future’s not bright.
The entire City of Waltham fire department showed up. Six fire trucks, maybe a dozen firefighters. All of them thinking, I can only assume, that there better fucking be some kind of a fire. I tried to assess whether any of them had started eating turkey, yet. Might they be too drowsy to fight any potential fires? Are their families going to kill me? What if they’re not back in time for pie? Will they come back and set the rest of my house on fire in the night?
Anyway, it took a bit of time but they did locate the source. A component of the refrigerator had burnt itself out and melted itself down, but there was no damage to the surrounding walls. My freshly painted kitchen walls. Can you imagine how pissed I would have been? Yeah, my house is still standing, BUT DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK ME TO PAINT THAT KITCHEN?
I can think of no one so thankful this Thanksgiving than us. Best of all, the firemen were back to the station well before pie. Thank you, Firefighters!
