FOOD ON THE FOOD

So It’s Come To This

I started the South Beach Diet on Monday. That means no sugar and no carbs for two weeks. Have I gone mad?

Yes. Yes I have.

The proof is in the pudding-sized pile of Butterfinger wrappers Husband came across a few weeks ago. I must have been so blissed out on mediocre chocolate and crystal peanut meth that I forgot to hide the evidence. Stealing from my own kids' Halloween buckets like a junky! For shame!!

It's no secret I've been having a hard time coming off the sugar-fueled roller coaster of the past year. Over the past two months, I've progressed to the point where I can go a whole day without sugar, two even, but by the end of the third, I'm wild-eyed and desperate and suddenly housing a jar of leftover chocolate fondue I found in the back of the fridge. A big jar. And I'm not feeling too good about myself afterwards.

That's where South Beach comes in. The underlying principle of the diet is to reset your physical and mental expectations for your sugar consumption. That means cutting out ALL sugar for the first two weeks, even the natural sugars found in high-glycemic fruits and vegetables as well as dairy. It's also means no carbs, which your body immediately converts into sugar. Meanwhile, you can eat as much as you want of everything else: meat, cheese, beans, eggs, nuts, leafy greens, cruciferous veggies. The idea is that once your system is entirely rid of the addictive substance, you don't crave it anymore. Then you can slowly add certain foods back into your diet (note: I don't think this works for cocaine).

Now before you start shaking your head at me like every single friend I've told about this bold move—as if Tom Cruise had suddenly appeared by my side with his manic, empty eyes and a mission— remember that this is just temporary. It's just for two weeks. I don't plan on living a carb-free, sugar-free life forever. I love those things and believe that most of them aren't bad for you in moderation. I just need to restore my original factory settings. The sugar cravings are driving me batshit insane, and something drastic needs to be done. They don't have any Betty Ford clinics for sugar addiction, as far as I know, so I'm stuck with the South Beach Diet and Husband as its bastard enforcer. It'll be a miracle if we're not divorced by Christmas.

After these two weeks pass, foods I fully intend to add back into my diet are: potatoes, whole grains, pasta, all fruits, and all the sweet veggies in my winter CSA share, like beets, squash, and parsnips. All of these will be fine once they don't taste like heroin to me. Thereafter, desserts will not be daily, and carby snacks discouraged. With any luck, I'll be able to return to my pre-cookbook way of eating, which has enabled me to maintain a stable, sustainable weight pretty much all my life thus far.

First step: clean out the refrigerator and freezer of all tempting items, including the pumpkin butter I like to eat out of the jar, and the various fig pastes left over from recipe-testing. Next, make the children eat the rest of their Halloween candy in one sitting. Hop to it, kids, you won't hear me say those words ever again. Ready, set, go! Third, have Husband hide the chocolates my neighbor brought back from Barcelona, and although you suspect he hid them in his own belly, try not to care. Fourth, send Husband to do the food shopping since he's the only one in this house who knows how to survive this diet AND lose 30 pounds AND keep it off. Fifth, get cooking.

Just don't mind my grumpy posts in the meantime!

Post-Thanksgiving Cleaning

I'm still sleeping off my Thanksgiving turkey—an amazingly tender specimen prepared by my mom—along with mashed potatoes, green beans, sweet potato casserole (sans marshmallow), cranberry sauce with port and roasted shallots, rice pudding, and pumpkin pie. God, I love Thanksgiving!

But I did find some time between naps to make a few changes to my blog's design. Nothing too crazy. I just wanted to organize things a little better, sweep out some cobwebs, and finally (finally!) add a navigation bar up there. I added a better search feature, too, and updated the About and FAQ pages. I hope you like it.

There's one thing that's still bothering me, though, and that's the Twitter feed. You may have noticed over the past few months that the updated Twitter widget no longer fit in my sidebar. In addition to being ugly as all hell, half of the words were cut off. I finally broke down and widened the left-hand column, but now the whole layout feels off balance to me. I'm thinking of scrapping the Twitter feed altogether. Does anyone even look at it?  Cast your anonymous vote below:

Keep the Twitter timeline in the sidebar or delete it?
	I love to read your Twitter feed. Keep it!
	It's ugly and adds no value to your blog. Trash it!
	I read your blog in a feed-reader, so I never see it.
	Words can't adequately express how much I don't care.
	Social media is dumb.
pollcode.com free polls

Feel free to leave any other comments in the comment section (e.g., if something isn't working properly or you hate the new font). I'm still tweaking things here and there.

Happy Turkey Day!

...from our neighborhood turkeys, who thank you for not eating "too local" this holiday!

Photo by Neighbor Husband.

Sticky Cranberry Gingerbread

If your Thanksgiving menu is not yet firm, and even if it is, here's something else to consider for the dessert table: moist, spicy gingerbread cake with a sticky layer of cranberries on the bottom.

Sound tempting? It's from Melissa Clark's newest book, Cook This Now. I thought the title of her book was a little presumptuous at first. Now, Melissa? Right now?? I haven't even gotten out of my pajamas, and I need to go to the store! But I'm very glad I didn't wait. I loved every bite. The bourbon-spiked whipped cream didn't hurt, either.

Here's my advice: stock up on in-season cranberries right now while they're at their peak, and store the bags in the freezer. Then you can make sticky cranberry gingerbread anytime during the holidays, not to mention delicious pancakes and muffins all winter long!


Sticky Cranberry Gingerbread (print-friendly version)

The recipe calls for golden syrup, which is a sugar-processing byproduct similar to molasses, but lighter. It's more of a British thing. I didn't have any golden syrup handy (and neither did my local grocers), so I planned to sub in honey or sugar, come what may. That is, until I remembered the jar of date syrup my friend brought me back from Israel (also called date honey). I used that instead and it was wonderful! You won't be able to find that, either, probably, but I see no reason why regular honey or just sugar wouldn't work. Follow your own instincts.

2 cups fresh or frozen cranberries (8 ounces)
1 cup granulated sugar
1 tablespoon water
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter
2/3 cup firmly packed dark brown sugar
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup molasses
1/4 cup golden syrup (or date syrup, honey, or sugar)
1-1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon ground ginger
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
2 large eggs, lightly beaten
1 tablespoon grated fresh gingerroot

Preheat the oven to 350°F. Butter an 8x8- or 9x9-inch square baking pan generously. Line the bottom with parchment paper.

In a small, heavy-bottomed saucepan, stir together the cranberries, granulated sugar, and water. Stir the slushy mixture over medium heat until the sugar is completely dissolved and the cranberries form a sauce that is syrupy and bubbling thickly, 8 to 10 minutes. Aim to have about half of the cranberries broken down, with the remainder more or less whole. Remove from the heat and set aside.

In a separate small saucepan, combine the butter, brown sugar, milk, molasses, and golden syrup over medium heat. Stir until the butter has melted and the mixture comes to a bare simmer, and then remove it from the heat. Don't let it boil or the mixture could curdle.

In a large bowl, sift together the flour, ground ginger, cinnamon, baking powder, salt, baking soda, and black pepper. Beat in the butter-molasses mixture, and then beat in the eggs. Stir in the grated gingerroot.

Pour the batter into the pan. Drop fat dollops of cranberry sauce onto the surface of the batter. Drag a long, slender knife through the batter in a swirly design, as if you are marbling a cake. Transfer the cake to the oven and bake until the top is firm and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean, 50 to 55 minutes. Let cool completely on a wire rack before serving.

Source: Adapted minimally from Cook This Now by Melissa Clark.

Local Ingredients:
Cranberries: Willows Cranberries, Wareham, MA
Butter: Cabot, Cabot, VT
Milk: Stonyfield Farms, Londonderry, NH

Food in Jars Giveaway

It's coming up on that time of year when I start to display an uncharacteristic generous streak. Yes, I have a few giveaways planned starting today. Of course, I'd love to raffle off a copy of my own book, but you won't want it in the condition that it's in right now, all marked up with edits. It should probably be printed on paper without pizza stains and maybe have the swears deleted. Some photographs might be nice, too. Let us gussy it up for you first!

Instead, I'd like to show you another book produced by my publisher earlier this year. It's Food in Jars by Marisa McClellan. You may know her from her great canning blog by the same name. Not surprisingly, it's about all the pretty seasonal things you can put in jars. Lest you think there's nothing left to can at this time of year, that I'm a little bit late as usual, may I direct you to the recipes for slow-cooker pear butter, cranberry conserve, apple pumpkin butter, sweet and sour pickled red onions, and gingery pickled beets. Oh, there's plenty, including handmade gift ideas like maple pecan granola, rosemary salt, and homemade cake mixes in jars.

I admire this book not just because of the recipes and the accessible writing style, but also because of how attractive it is. I just love the jacketless cover, the gorgeous photos of jams dripping all over the place, the nice, thick paper. Will my cookbook end up looking like this, I wonder? Holy crap, I hope so!!

Running Press is giving away one copy of Food in Jars to be raffled off to a special someone. (And, no, my publisher did not ask me to post this. You know I don't like to do anything people tell me to do. Just ask Husband.) To be entered, leave a comment on this post about food or jars or whatever you want. I'm not being picky today. If you've recipe-tested for my book, you get to enter twice to double your chances (submit two separate comments or the random number generator will only count you once). The contest will close on Sunday 11/18 at 10 p.m. EST. Have at it!

A Typical Conversation Between Two Married People

Why is it that people who've been married for more than five years can't have a normal conversation?

Me: Did you put the pizza away?

Him: What pizza?

Me: The pizza we had for dinner. Did you put it away?

Him: (expressionless silence)

Me: Yes or no??

Him: What do you think?

Me: I'm asking you so I don't have to think. Did you or didn't you?

Him: Yes! I put it away hours ago!!

Me: Okay! Good! Jesus!

First rule of marriage: Questions can only be answered with other questions until there are so many stacked on top of each other that you reach a state of infinite gravity and get sucked into a black hole in the universe.

Autumn Vegetable Cobbler with Cheddar Crust

The temperature is dropping, my fridge is full of root vegetables, my counters piled high with squash: it's about time I shared with you my new favorite fall dish!

I'm calling it a cobbler, because I'm still in dessert mode, but it's basically a vegetarian pot pie or savory casserole. Tender chunks of autumn vegetables scented with tomato, garlic, and marjoram are topped with a cheddar biscuit crust. I used carrots, celery root, and acorn squash, but you could sub in a parsnip or two for some of the carrots, and use any other kind of winter squash you like. This recipe is based on one from Bistro Cooking at Home, a book written by Boston's own Gordon Hamersley. I had many a fine meal at Hamersley's Bistro back in the day when I wrote the food column for the South End News. Since then, this book has allowed me to engage in a little fine dining without having to pay for a babysitter or try to remember where the hell to park (reminder to self: NOT on Washington Street).

Anyway, this dish isn't fussy, but it does require a fair amount of cooking time to get those veggies to be so meltingly tender. Plan accordingly. I've had several requests for the recipe at a recent dinner party, so here it is.

Autumn Vegetable Cobbler with Cheddar Crust (print-friendly version)

Don't be alarmed by the amount of liquid you add to the vegetables. It looks like too much, but it's not. Trust me, it will absorb and thicken into a lovely gravy-like sauce. I think fresh marjoram is absolutely perfect here, but you could also use fresh thyme or a teaspoon or so of dried marjoram, thyme, or oregano. 

Filling
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
3 tablespoons unsalted butter
1 red onion, cut into 1-inch pieces
3 medium carrots, cut into 1-inch rounds
1 medium celery root, peeled and cut into 1-inch pieces
1 acorn squash, peeled and cut into 1-inch pieces
2 garlic cloves, finely chopped
1 cup dry white wine
3 tablespoons tomato paste
3 cups water (or veggie or chicken stock)
1 tablespoon chopped fresh marjoram
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper

Topping
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon baking powder
6 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into small cubes
1 to 1-1/3 cups heavy cream
1-1/2 teaspoons finely chopped garlic
Pinch of coarsely ground black pepper
1/2 cup grated sharp Cheddar cheese (not shredded--you want small flecks)

Heat the oven to 400°F. In a large sauté pan, heat half of the oil and half of the butter over medium-high heat. Add the onions, carrots, and celery root, and cook, stirring occasionally, until the vegetables are browned, about 7 minutes. Transfer the cooked vegetables to a 13x9-inch casserole dish or roasting pan. Melt the rest of the oil and butter in the hot skillet. Add the acorn squash and sauté until lightly browned, about 7 minutes. Stir in the garlic and cook for another couple of minutes, then add to the casserole dish.

Increase the heat to high and add the white wine, tomato paste, and water (or stock) to the sauté pan. Bring to a boil, scraping up the browned bits stuck to the bottom of the pan, lower the heat, and simmer for about 3 minutes. Add this liquid to the casserole, sprinkle with marjoram, and season with salt and pepper to taste. Cover with aluminum foil and bake until the vegetables are just tender, about 30 minutes.

While the vegetables are baking, make the topping. In a food processor, whiz together the flour, salt, and baking powder until combined. Add the butter cubes and pulse until the mixture resembles a coarse meal (20 to 30 pulses). Empty the contents into a bowl and stir in 1 cup of cream, garlic, and pepper. If the mixture is too dry, add more cream. Mix in the grated cheese just until it holds together. Let rest. (You can also make the biscuits by hand, cutting in the butter with two knives or a pastry cutter.)

Remove the veggies from the oven and take off the foil. Using a large spoon, dot the surface of the vegetables with Ping-Pong ball-sized dollops of biscuit dough. The topping should be lumpy and bumpy. Return the casserole to the upper third of the oven and bake, uncovered, until the topping is cooked and browned, about 25 minutes. Let cool 10 minutes before serving.

Source: Adapted from Bistro Cooking at Home by Gordon Hamersley and Joanne McAllister Smart.

Local Ingredients:
Onion, carrots, celery root, squash, garlic: Waltham Fields Community Farm, Waltham, MA
Butter, cheddar: Cabot, Cabot, VT
Cream: High Lawn Farm, Lee, MA
Marjoram: My plant that I somehow managed not to kill this year

Trick or Treating at the Local Cheese Shop

Yesterday, while shopping at Russo's, I found myself rubbing up against the cheese case, caressing the little pats of goat cheese, and trying with mixed success to sniff the various wedges through their wrappers. Business as usual.

That's when I came across a few bundles swaddled in cheese paper from Cowgirl Creamery. The California food bloggers are always going on and on and on about Cowgirl Creamery, so I was excited to have the chance to sample some of their curds for myself. On offer was a triple cream called Mt. Tam. I didn't even get the connection with my own name at first, but Husband insisted on driving the point home. I had to suffer through several iterations of:

Him: What's this cheese called again?

Me: Mount Tam.

Him: Don't mind if I do!

Me: ...

If only I had a sense of humor in real life!

As for the cheese, consider my mind blown. I LOVED it. So rich! So buttery! So delicately mushroomy! Be sure to let it sit out for several hours at room temperature (4 to 5 hours is ideal) so that the texture will be appropriately soft, creamy, and luscious. Heaven!

I've sampled lots of new-to-me local cheeses from Massachusetts and Vermont, too, but that's a post for another time. Right now, I'm basking in a post-cheese glow that I hope will keep my hand out of the Halloween candy for at least a little while!