There are many different kinds of burns that one might sustain in the kitchen. Steam burns. Oil spatters. Boiling water that you pour out into the sink but a dirty dish is at just the right angle that it splashes all over yourself. Hot sheet pans that brand stripes into your forearms. Metal pot handles that (surprise!) get as hot as the pan itself. I could go on.
But the worst kind of burn, by far, is the caramel burn. That shit sticks like glue and will cause you a world of pain for as long as it remains adhered. I have some experience with this, meaning that the part of my brain responsible for storing memories is permanently blistered and raw. So when I saw a recipe for burnt caramel gelato from Sally Sampson’s book, Recipe of the Week: Ice Cream, I thought, finally, an opportunity to get caramel back.
If you’ve ever had the burnt caramel ice cream at Toscanini’s, then you know how creamy and sweet and bitter that flavor is all at once. There’s something very coffee-like about the way that bitterness asserts itself in the finish, and it’s similarly addictive. So, between that and my persistent grudge, I took great pleasure in burning that caramel. And just when I thought it couldn’t get any more burnt, I burned it some more. Take that. And that!
The recipe is here if you’re interested. I strongly suggest you make it. If you don’t have an ice cream machine, well, I know someone who’s making a list and checking it twice!
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And while we’re on the subject of painful burns: as part of my pledge to humor no more than one PR person per year from all of the unsolicited e-mails I get, 2008’s lucky winner is Amy Gan of Phyllis Klein. Because burns are no laughing matter (except today on my blog), and every day that goes by that Burn Jel Plus is not in my medicine cabinet is another day to feel guilty. Usually because I’ve just burned myself. Apparently, it’s based on the same stuff that firefighters and the military use. I’ll be checking in with my firefighter sources to confirm this. If I can just reach the phone, 9-1-…
I'd like to sign up to be the PR person who gets humored in 2009, please.
Posted by: Flak Attack | December 12, 2008 at 01:01 PM
As far as burns go, I once took a sheet tray out of an oven not realizing that there were two pans stacked together. The top one slid off and provided me with a nasty burn on the inside of my arm. Sizzled like a sausage. I put on one of those weird moist bandages and you know I barely have a scar any more.
Hmmm, make you sick?
Good. Pass the burnt sugar ice cream then please!
Posted by: Lily VS | December 12, 2008 at 11:29 PM
When I was making popcorn balls with a friend around Halloween, I accidentally poured molten caramel on her hand. She has a scar. I still feel guilty.
Posted by: adele | December 13, 2008 at 01:10 PM
Didn't your mom ever teach you that the most effective treatment for caramel burns is to put ice cream on them?
Posted by: Barry Foy | December 13, 2008 at 09:34 PM
This ice cream is DELISH! And well worth the risk!
Thanks!
P.S. The best ever thing for burns is to pour apple cider vinegar over it immediately - stops stinging and no blistering!
Posted by: Linda | December 14, 2008 at 07:21 PM
Oh, Burnt Carmel and Ginger Snap Molassas are my FAVORITES at Toscaninis!!!
Love them! Love them!!! Want some now. Got the kid an ice cream maker for the holiday - cant wait to try this!
Posted by: monica | December 14, 2008 at 08:52 PM
monica: You're the best mommy!
Linda: Very good to know. I'll try to remember that.
Barry: Mmmmmm, burnt skin ice cream!
adele: Well, that's one way to test the bonds of friendship! But now you know you have a friend for life.
Lily VS: Human flesh should never sizzle like a sausage. And now I'm going to resume the fetal position.
Flak Attack: You're totally grandfathered. WordPerfect is soooooooo awesome. See? Do you even represent them anymore?
Posted by: Tammy | December 14, 2008 at 09:52 PM