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November 19, 2008

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The delicious foundation of fats, oils and sweets?

I prefer the food web, wherein cows (a primary consumer) are lower than salmon (a secondary or tertiary consumer). Ever see a salmon eat a cow? Nothing but bone in under 30 seconds.

Oh my, that is so awesome. That's my kind of food pyramid!

There is absolutely no problem with that pyramid at all. None.

Woman, is cream cheese the only dairy you provide these children?!? For heaven's sake, I'd expect any child of yours to at least have yogurt up there!

The convenient thing about that pyramid is that you can add a head, arms, and legs and you will have the body I would get from eating that nutritional profile. It may be wide at the bottom, but it sure is delicious!

This makes perfect sense. The weight and density of the cream cheese causes it to sink to the bottom. It passes through the fruits and vegetables, floating nearer the top by virtue of their water content, picking up needed sugar and raspberries. The Triscuits and Mini Wheats are nailed across their layer and act as carbo-cheese cloth, packing down the solids to become the cheesecake with raspberry drizzle. The Gorton's fish sticks will slide down the side because of the grease.

Interesting. Does that mean I can put butter in or on everything, now? :)

Hilarious. Jeez.

And Katie, that writer's pyramid is awesome. I'm saving that.

I knew you'd like that Melissa! I'm sticking with that one!

Katie: It's clear I'm going to need more vices if I'm going to be a real writer. I've always wanted to smoke a pipe.

Melissa: I now have that Writer's Food Pyramid posted above my desk to remind me to drink more caffeine. I totally sleep away my best ideas.

Adele: I think the USDA would say YES!

Jess: Mmmmmm, you're right! Watch out, USDA, we have a competing pyramid. Your jobs are numbered.

Andrea: Funny you should mention it, but that triangle was part of a larger art project that had a head complete with chef's hat as well as arms and legs (which I removed for the picture, and then got in big trouble by the Kindergartener when he saw the dismembering). I'm not actually kidding.

NurseJen: Keep in mind that I played no role whatsoever in the creation of this pyramid. If I had my druthers, it would be just one big triangular block of bacon and chocolate.

Alecto: Agreed.

What a Card: It's actually pretty accurate when you consider how much corn syrup is in everything these days.

Heather: I've never seen a salmon eat a cow, but I'd be first in line to eat that particular salmon.

Earth fruit: Thanks, Robolad.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=COcR2Erpbx4

Not totally unrelated...

Where around the Cambridge area are there any bakeries, restaurants, eateries, grocers, or what mail order shops are there for bread made from chickpea flour already prepared?...

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