However, I had to put my cat to sleep, so that’s what we’ve got to work with today.
What can I say about Mr. Nathan? He was a cat. He was gray. He was none too bright. He was also my very first pet (if you don’t count all those fish I killed). As college seniors, my BFF and I went down to the Union Square animal shelter looking for some cute decoys to stall our biological clocks for as long as humanly possible. One little kitten crawled into my lap and fell asleep. I swooned. At the time, I didn’t realize he was only looking for a warm place to sleep, it didn’t matter where (a trait that would remain constant throughout his 14 years). No, I thought he was claiming me. And I wanted to be claimed.
He was a loyal friend, Mr. Nathan. He saw me through five apartments, six jobs, and one very persistent boyfriend. Did he complain when I got married, had kids, and then barely paid him any attention? Yes, actually, he did complain about that. As he should have. But did he complain when I actually named one of the kids a variation of his own name, because it really was one of the few names I liked, thereby infringing on the only thing he could truly call his own? He probably complained about that, too. I don’t speak cat. But the point is that he didn’t throw in the towel. He might have run away a couple of times, but he always came back.
In the end, it was a tumor blocking his intestines that promised to starve him to death before too long, so we made a call. No cat chemo. No surgery. Just a week of full-on attention like the good old days. Jazz and tuna fish milkshakes.
I loved that stupid cat.
(Or was he a llama?)
Why do you seperate your emotions from your pets? They can see into you far more than you believe.
Posted by: kowalski | November 21, 2008 at 09:04 PM
kowalski: Don't let me fool you. It's just my way of coping. Thanks for your comment.
Posted by: Tammy | November 21, 2008 at 09:19 PM
Our two furry boys send their condolences...
Posted by: andrea | November 21, 2008 at 09:46 PM
Condolences, Tammy. Kitty love rules. :(
Posted by: Cornelia | November 22, 2008 at 01:13 AM
I'm sorry to hear! After working with a number of animal shelters, though, I always have to smile a little when a once homeless and unwanted animal gets to pass away after the chance to live in a good home with a family that really loves him. Thank you!
Posted by: melch | November 22, 2008 at 02:02 AM
That's a tough call Tammy. So sorry you had to make it. Your boy OK? 14 years, huh? That was a good long life. Time for a new pet?
Posted by: Sally | November 22, 2008 at 07:24 AM
May Bast welcome him in with open... uh, paws (Look it up, it's good distraction from grief...)
Posted by: NurseJen | November 22, 2008 at 08:16 AM
That sucks. I do like the drawing though. You appear to have had a very llamaesque cat.
Posted by: Mary | November 22, 2008 at 09:47 AM
Jazz and tuna milkshakes - now that is the cats pajamas. Sorry to hear about Mr. Nathan.
Posted by: Lily VS | November 22, 2008 at 10:22 AM
Sorry T! After a rough start Mr Nathan and I eventually became friends and he would often come to me for petting or a brushing whenever I came to babysit. I will miss him too.
Posted by: Dad | November 22, 2008 at 11:02 AM
What a lovely obituary for Mr. Nathan. I have to confess I'm not really a pet lover, but this was really touching. Love the drawing.
Posted by: Kalyn | November 22, 2008 at 12:30 PM
You have my condolences. Cats grow to occupy a very special niche in the heart. I hope Mr. Nathan gets to frolic in kitty-heaven with all the mice to chase and cream to drink and warm places to sleep that he could ever want. My Lady Olivia sends you some purrs, and her cohort of Bitey and George promise to chew up some (more) important paperwork and knock (more) half-filled cups over in honour of Mr. Nathan.
Posted by: Lina Kirkwood | November 22, 2008 at 01:53 PM
You did a very brave thing. It's hard, but it's kind of beautiful. You gave Mr. Nathan his angel wings.
I'm sad you're sad.
xoxo
Posted by: cookiecrumb | November 22, 2008 at 02:08 PM
CC: Sure didn't feel like wings when he hooked himself onto me with those sharp claws at separation time. But my mother-in-law said it right, it's a decision they can't make for themselves.
Lina: Love your cat's name (Bitey)! I'm sure that Mr. Nathan has all the mice in the world to chase now, which he will continue to not chase but instead stare at in a confused fashion.
Kalyn: Thank you. I love the drawing, too.
Dad: Yeah, he really did a number on you that time, didn't he? I'm glad you guys worked things out.
Lily VS: Well, they were really more like tuna watershakes, but it's the tuna part that's important.
Mary: In actuality, he was more pantherlike than llamalike, but I'm not a very good artist.
NurseJen: I hope Bast thinks highly of lounging.
Sally: The kids took it very well. After I distracted them with euphemistic answers to their many questions, they kind of shrugged and said, well, we still have one cat left. And we do.
melch: It's true. They can fit a lot of love in those little cat bodies.
Cornelia: Thank you.
Andrea: Much appreciated.
Posted by: Tammy | November 22, 2008 at 02:19 PM
Mr. Nathan and I had our clashes over the years. I was initially horribly allergic to him (thanks Tammy!). Early in his life he was not very good at keeping clean and so he was a stinky cat until he saw our other cat licking herself and caught on. He had a proclivity toward placing his arse outside the litter box to do a #2. He liked to hack up hairballs on carpets and couches rather than an easy-to-clean hardwood floor. His fur accumulated in corners until it seemed he was replicating himself. He also liked to howl, especially at night, which was disconcerting to houseguests.
But he was a sweet boy who loved to be pet. In fact, he loved when I came over to Tammy's apartment because I would slowly and carefully scritchy-scratch all over his head, under his chin, and around his ears. He loved tuna water squeezed from a can. He would come when called, eager to jump on a warm lap. He was a champion napper and loved to play with string. He was a good cat.
RIP Mr.Nathan
Posted by: Husband | November 22, 2008 at 02:23 PM
That was a lovely tribute and I am so sorry, it is never an easy decision to make.
Posted by: jo | November 22, 2008 at 07:17 PM
Sounds like Mr Nathan enjoyed his stay with you.
We've had to make that decision twice - we currently have 5 cats - sometimes I think we need our heads examined when we keep taking the fuzzy critters in knowing that we'll have to make that decision a few more times.
Posted by: Gwen | November 22, 2008 at 08:40 PM
If I'm not mistaken, I attended a surprise party of some kind for you, that might have been 14 or so years ago. And what I distinctly recall is standing too close to the door when someone yelled, "She's coming!" So I did what any good surprise party goer would do and sprinted for cover ... just as a little grey thing I can only assume was Mr. Nathan in his kitten years scampered past my foot. And by "past" I mean "was punted by." I think I kicked him across your kitchen. Glad to hear he didn't suffer any lasting damage.
Posted by: Fish Sauce Hater | November 23, 2008 at 03:19 PM
Hater: So now it all comes out! But what's even more disturbing than an airborne kitten is that I don't remember this party at all. Not at all.
Gwen: Wow, that's a lot of cats. You're in good company with my dad.
jo: Thank you. It stinks.
Husband: And speaking of stinking, I totally forgot about Mr. Nathan's Stinky Phase. I'm sure he thanks you for the reminder.
Posted by: Tammy | November 23, 2008 at 03:51 PM
He was definitely a cat and I am so, so sorry. I'm thinking that Chuck is not long for this world (she, yes, she, is approaching 12 and is seriously senile) and I don't want to make that drive to the vet but it's coming.
Posted by: Alecto | November 23, 2008 at 08:30 PM
I am sorry.
I have yet to lose a pet...but I hope I can handle it as well and as gracefully as you.
Posted by: Susan | November 24, 2008 at 12:41 AM
May Mr. Nathan continue to romp and play in the woods. We made the same decision for our Gretchen last month (14 w pancreatitis). We have a lovely vet who came to our house. I'm reminded of one of my favorite quotes: "Another cat? Perhaps. For love there is also a season; its seeds must be resown. But a family cat is not replaceable like a wornout coat or a set of tires. Each new kitten becomes its own cat, and none is repeated. I am four cats old, measuring out my life in friends that have succeeded but not replaced one another." ~ Irving Townsend
Posted by: Jess | November 24, 2008 at 10:40 AM
Tammy,
I'm so sorry and sad that you are sad. The decision could not have come easy...and i know and mr. nathan knows you struggled. He was an amazing part of your life, seeing you through several life-changing events. He loved you and he knew (he did!)he was well-loved. I'm sorry i wasn't there to hold your hand. You have a hug waiting...
ernie
bff
Posted by: Ernie | November 24, 2008 at 05:07 PM
Aww...I'm really sorry. Mine's getting up there, but I don't want to think about going through what you're going through.
Posted by: Heather | November 25, 2008 at 12:30 AM
Jack and the new kitten are awfully sorry about Mr. Nathan.
Our condolences.
Posted by: Deanna | November 25, 2008 at 02:21 PM
=( I'm sorry about Mr. Nathan Tammy. That's sad because it's necessary and it sucks. Sounds like he enjoyed living with you though and I imagine you gave him a happy existence.
Posted by: Melissa | November 28, 2008 at 06:10 PM