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September 02, 2008

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Ah-ha! Just the recipe I could use to test out my brand new food processor!

The gun is optional, right?

You know, when they sent me off to public school i came home singing, "we are all a lesbian!" It's true. We are. In a straight kind of way. I don't think it was an accident that we ended up in catholic school again the next year. It was in New Haven, too. Aren't your people from there?

I have never thrown anything through a plate glass window (yet!), but I have felt the exhilaration of throwing a plate of food at a wall, which broke the plate in a satisfying crash (the resultant mess was totally worth it).

You should get a new apron and work that into your hand-wringing. It's a nice image, I think.

You know, you could always homeschool them. That will protect you from the dreaded "job market".

Ah. A real job. Ew.

Transitioning to calling them the new names which were the old names sounds just fine to me. ;)

I want to make this just for myself. While watching that movie, which I always wanted to see but never did.

YES. OH MY GOD YES. That movie is brilliant.

Sorry. I found your blog (brilliant, has nearly made me piss my pants with laughter multiple times- maybe a few hundred?- and, um, did I mention I think you're hilarious? Not, like, me laughing AT you funny, but... there's my foot down my throat and a very long parenthetical comment...) and have been slowly working my way up to the present by reading the backlog like a creepy, creepy stalker sort of person. I'm sorry. I'm not really that creepy... I hope...

Anyway.

About the gazpacho? You forgot the morphine.

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