Well, I’m surprised it took me this long to get to our second installment of Who Wants to be a Moron?, but here we are at last. As always, the object of the game is for you to make me feel better by providing SPECIFIC scenarios in which you were stupider than I was.
First, let me just say that there’s been a lot of vomit in our house lately. Just the Toddler’s, but what he lacks in size he makes up for in volume and frequency. As a result, nobody’s been getting much sleep around here, and the laundry and dishes have been piling up. Not a good time for a major appliance to break.
The trouble started with a jeweled goblet (doesn’t it always?). We got one for each kid at a medieval-themed birthday party over the weekend. The Preschooler became so enamored with his goblet that he has since requested that all of his beverages be supplied in a vessel encrusted with rhinestones. Luckily, our entire house is constructed of rhinestones, so this is not a problem.
For some reason that even I can’t understand, it ended up in the dishwasher. By my own hand. (The left is blaming the right, and the right is blaming the left, but I know my precious left hand would never do such a thing.)
Does this look dishwasher-safe to you?
How about now?
The gems have mysteriously disappeared, which may explain the horrible grinding sound emanating from the dishwasher motor. It's worse than fingernails against a chalkboard. I’m sure the trolls that live deep within the manifold (kin to the sock-stealing trolls that inhabit the dryer) are dancing a gleeful jig right now, proclaiming, “We’re rich! We’re rich! We’ll never work again!”
In the meantime, I’m trying to figure out how to break the news to Husband. Maybe I’ll just wait until he reads it on my blog!
So, spill it, people. Has anyone ever destroyed a major appliance in a more idiotic fashion? Please spare me no details. I need something to carry me through all of the dishwashing that lies ahead of me. In keeping with the bacon prize theme, I have some lovely bacon band-aids for the person who has the best story. Ah, the healing power of pork products…