The Preschooler: On Cheese-Making

Him: How do you make cheese?

Me: Well, first you take milk, and then you cook it.  And, um, well…(god, I should really know this.  How DO you make cheese, again?).  You mix it with some stuff, then you kind of squish it down until you get cheese.  And then you can eat it just like that, or you can put it in a cave for a little while where it’s nice and cool.

Him: A cave?

Me: Yeah.

Him: With bears?

Me: Well, they try to pick a cave without bears.  Otherwise, they’d eat all the cheese.

Him: Oh.  Why don’t they put it in the refrigerator, instead?

Me: Hmmm.  Good question.  I guess cheesemakers are just really, really dumb.

I didn’t really say that, for crying out loud.  But, now that I mention it, why are cheesemakers so dumb?  Roaming the wilderness in search of caves, bears waiting to ambush them at every turn, when there’s a perfectly good, mold-free fridge right there?

Comments

[Lily VS]

Wait, I thought cheese was supposed to be moldy. And stink like feet. Right?

[Tammy]

Exactly.

[izzy's mama]

You should join us..we are going to visit some cheese caves next week, in the middle of NYC..hope there aren't any bears.

[Linda]

I visited the village of Roquefort, the home of the famous French blue cheese. The story goes-for your son-that a young shepherd was just about to have lunch of cheese and bread when he saw a lovely young maiden across the field. He stuffed his cheese into a cave for late and set off after the girl and, thus, forgot about the cheese for a couple of months. When he came back there was the cheese with blue spots and lines running through it. He tasted it and was in heaven. His family started putting all of their cheese in those caves with special temperatures and air flow and an industry was born. Only cheese from those caves can be called Roquefort cheese. I bought the smallest amount I could which was a huge wedge and spent weeks trying different recipes using it. My favorite was stuffed, twice baked potatoes with blue cheese.

[Tammy]

Linda: Aw, what a sweet story. Did he get the girl in the end? Or did he get a slap to the face when he offered her moldy cheese?

Izzy's Mama: Wish I could join you, but I'm afraid of NYC. I did see the one at Formaggio's Kitchen in Cambridge, however.

[Adele]

Do children still hear that the moon is made of green cheese, or has that bit of myth been thoroughly ruined by Apollo and all that?

(I admit, I found Cookie Monster's idea about the moon being made of cookie more appealing.)

[Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah]

Stupid cheesemakers - risking bear related cheese losses.

[Mary]

I would think they'd be stupid if they put the cheese in caves WITH bears.

[Tammy]

Mary: Yeah. Total morons.

Sarah: And what about bats? Surely bats would hanker for a hunk of cheese.

Adele: My kids like that Wallace and Gromit short where they fly to the moon in search of cheese, so I think that idea still lives on, NASA or no NASA:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPc0sE6V9Z0

[Adele]

Of course! I completely forgot about that Wallace and Gromit short.

[Deanna]

Stupid bears. They eat all the honey, and all the cheese, what's next? All the squash? Oh the humanity!!!

Great, now I'm gonna have to go to DiBruno Bro's... the cheese monster needs to be fed. Mmmm Lactose!

[Bri]

I love your preschooler's take on everything. My husband (who's biracial) and I are still laughing about the gingerbread men discussion. I made some ricotta the other day and posted about it and have been making paneer regularly, so I beginning to have more appreciation for the quirks of cheesemakers. You guys should try it out. It's easy, fun, and rather instant gratification for short attention spanned tots (and moms).