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January 10, 2008

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That stranger was me! Just kidding.

Pete said nothing but "Mama! Diti!" until he was 2.5. I always knew exactly what he meant, so he had no incentive to learn any real words. "Mama" was his way to get my attention; "Diti" was whatever he wanted to say. He'd say, "Mama! Diti!" and I'd say, "Oh, you want more Cheerios!" and then he'd say "Mama! Diti!" and I'd say, "That certainly is a big bulldozer!" etc. Andy thought we were both nuts.

Way back when my daughter was around 2yrs old, she told me she wanted "doh-dit". "Donut"? I thought. "No! Doh-dit! Doh-dit!" Both of us spent the entire day frustrated, me because I was unable to translate, and she because she couldn't get through my obviously dense head. It took me until late afternoon to finally translate. "Yogurt?" I asked. "Yes" she said, with as much relief as a toddler could muster.

I think a combination of ignoring/tolerating the previous screaming and a built-in desire to refuse his demands has impaired (retarded) Tammy's Toddlerese learning curve quite a bit. I have far less trouble translating Toddler wants and needs, and often I am the one telling Tammy what he wants. She hates that.

I also tend to cave in to the wants and needs far more easily. Secret cookies and the like, for instance.

In the early talking days, I confess I did say "Oh yes...umm-hmmm!" quite a bit as a standard response, but these days Toddler is much more understandable.

Husband: Stop calling me retarded.

Dena: I know that look of relief. Wish I saw it more often, instead of the one that looks like his head is about to explode.

Karen: Sounds like you're much more observant than I am. Context clues are useless to me. I need subtitles or something.

I can't stop saying "peacocker"

I'm just jealous of all of you because my 16-week old doesn't say much beyond, "aasdgageadabeadgeadsddllll ..."

Ah, the complex inner lives of children. My grandmother was babysitting a toddler of Chinese heritage and kept saying "ludos". He was frustrated she didn't get it, she was frustrated she didn't get it. Finally she drove him to a Chinese restaurant to see if they could translate the obvious Mandarin word for what he wanted. They listened to him once and looked at my grandmother informing her that he wanted noodles. Good thing they were at a Chinese restaurant ;)

Kids. You spend the first two years teaching them to walk and talk. And the next 20 telling them to sit down and shut up! Waddya going to do?

I'd been babysitting my two-year-old nephew on and off for a couple of weeks, and the struggle to decipher his incessant babbling was beginning to wear on me. Imagine my surprise when, one day, it all finally came clear: "If you really loved me," the poor kid had been trying to say, "you'd quit trying to make me eat that damn pumpkin halvah." I forgave the "damn."

I have to agree with Sally. My daughter told my she had to go potty until she was at least 5. Finally I had to tell her - GO, I don't need updates anymore. Today I had a two hour!! phone conversation with her. Actually, I enjoyed it and the fact that she still talks to me like I have a brain. Unfortunatly,I still have a problem understanding everything she saysI use the Husbands ummmm-hummm.
Enjoy while you can, it goes way too fast.

Brenda: When I'm old and toothless, they'll get me back for sure. And now I have to go potty.

Barry: You can forgive the damn, but you can never forgive the halvah.

Sally: I know. What was I thinking?

Bri: Do you think it will work if I bring mine to a Chinese restaurant?

Hater: Count yourself lucky!

Joey: Me, neither!

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