We interrupt Cookbook Friday for an important newsflash.
The FDA recently approved food from cloned animals for human consumption! Yaaaaayyyyyy!!! It's about time. I always refer to my steaks as Bessie, and now it really will be Bessie every single time. Will the clones come complete with a gene for special sauce, I wonder?
To pile good news on top of good news, the FDA has also said that they don’t expect to require labels specifying that the meat came from a clone. Which is good because that’s a lot of work. Seems safe enough, they say, after testing the dietary effects for a whopping 3.5 months. Wow. Some of the most dreaded diseases in human history won’t kill you in that time span. But, thanks.
So, maybe cloned meat is fine to eat. Maybe it is, and maybe it isn’t. But what about meat from a clone of a clone? Or a clone of a clone of a clone of a clone? I’m just asking. Because you know it’s going to come up eventually. We humans aren’t so good with the setting of the boundaries and the sticking to them. What if a clone is fed a diet composed entirely of clones of itself? And what if I had my own clone over for dinner and we ate meat from that clone-fed clone, all while watching Star Wars: Attack of the Clones? Could happen. Have you thought about that, FDA?
Here’s another hypothetical situation. Have you ever made a photocopy of a photocopy of a photocopy on a crappy Xerox machine? The final product turns out a little muddy, kind of crooked, with the bottom cut off. And it tastes terrible. I wonder if DNA is built to withstand triple overtime? Oh, who cares, I bet the flesh of zombie genetic code is delicious AND nutritious. Mmmmm, the undead.
But just on the off chance that it’s not, wouldn’t it be nice if that meat had a label?