Word is, the Eat Local segment that the CBS Early Show people shot in September will not be airing after all. Yup, just like that.
I’m more disappointed than I thought I would be considering I was praying the camera people would disappear into thin air on the way to my house. But, that’s just the way it goes sometimes. Even in print media, sometimes stories run and sometimes they don’t. There are many factors involved, including whether or not your interview subject bothers to do her hair.
Still, being predictably human, I couldn’t help but run through the usual buffet of emotions associated with my (albeit petty) loss:
1. Denial
My e-mail correspondence with the producer went something like this:
Her: Blah, blah, blah...blah, blah, blah...so it probably won’t run. I’m sorry.
Me: Okay, so next week then?
Her: Well, maybe not ever.
Me: That should give me enough time to figure out how to work my VCR. What day should I set it for again?
2. Anger
Areyoufuckingkiddingme?DoyouknowhowmuchIstressedoutoverthis?HowBUSYI
wasinSeptember?IactuallywroteoutpotentialanswerstoyourpotentialquestionssoI
wouldn’tendupsoundinglikethis:fwahyayayyayayayafwayayayayafwayayayaya.
Doyouknowhowharditistoanswerquestionswhenyou’rehalfwayonthevergeof
soilingyourself?Doyouevenknowhowpissedmydadisgoingtobewhenhefindsout
thathe’snotgoingtobeonTV?Andwhataboutthefarmers?THEFARRRMERSSSSS...
3. Bargaining
Me: We could add some car chases...
Her: ...
Me: Tractor chases?
Her: ...
Me: How about...stampedes. Yeah, maybe all of the animals could escape from the farm and terrorize the city.
Her: Do you really think that’s going to help your cause?
Me: My what?
4. Depression
Me: (sigh) We’re fucked. Nobody’s going to eat local ever again. All because of me. Me and my stupid hair. Pass the rest of those Nestle Crunches.
5. Acceptance
All right, so what were we talking about? Oh yeah, Cookbook Friday. So, should we do another cookie or are we getting sick of cookies? What? More cookies? You got it.
That's a drag. I guess eating local isn't sexy or controversial enough.
Posted by: Kalyn | November 06, 2007 at 11:35 PM
Next year we eat local, but as cannibals.
CBS, you WILL come crawling back!
Posted by: Husband | November 07, 2007 at 01:16 AM
Damn! I was really looking forward to that! The idiots.
Posted by: Sally | November 07, 2007 at 07:45 AM
Oh no! I second everyone above. :-(
Posted by: susanna | November 07, 2007 at 07:46 AM
Susanna and Sally: Thanks for your condolences. Right now, I'm working on the lesser known 6th step: relief.
Husband: Crap, I didn't even think of that. Can we go back to bargaining?
Kalyn: Not sexy is right. Did I mention my hair?
Posted by: Tammy | November 07, 2007 at 08:36 AM
It wasn't you T, it was me! Once those network prima donnas took a look at my interview they knew they were history if it ever ran on national TV. They had to spike the show to protect themselves. Really, I tried to tone it down but that natural charisma of mine is tough to hide. Thank goodness I don't have an overbearing ego!
Posted by: Dad | November 07, 2007 at 11:59 AM
Ya want I should send uncle Luigi to have a chat wit 'em ?
Posted by: joey | November 07, 2007 at 06:04 PM
I was going to comment, but I can't top the cannibals comment above. So I'll just say "bummer".
Posted by: Luther | November 08, 2007 at 01:05 PM
If it's any consolation, CBS is a dinosaur of a network that has utterly failed to embrace new media and thus, will likely die a painful death as another major media company (TimeWarnerAOLGENBCViacomDisneyABC) will buy them and gut them while trying to milk whatever cachet or relvance may still linger within their dying brand. So there!
Posted by: Fuck Edward R. Murrow! | November 09, 2007 at 11:16 AM
FERM: And to think, they could have avoided all that with a simple little story about families supporting local farmers.
Luther: Somehow, the world keeps turning.
Joey: Send 'em.
Dad: You're right. It's not everyday they get to see charisma like that!
Posted by: Tammy | November 09, 2007 at 11:20 AM
Well at least I don't have to stay tuned on CBS~ I am changing the channel NOW.
Posted by: sandi @ the whistlestop cafe | November 09, 2007 at 04:32 PM
Maybe you could ask CBS for the tape and YouTube it.
Locaviral!
Posted by: cookiecrumb | November 10, 2007 at 03:14 PM
CC: What, and immortalize my hair?
Sandi: I just smashed my TV set with a baseball bat, but, um, yeah, I guess changing the channel would have been fine, too.
Posted by: Tammy | November 11, 2007 at 10:10 PM