Crap, Tricked by Porn, Again

In my always-delicious spam mailbox, I got an interesting note from “Wilma” about “extensive cock MAssgdadfg.”  The timing couldn’t have been better.  Truth be told, I’ve been a bit flummoxed as to where to find large caches of local poultry, preferably within five miles of my house with no left turns.  Pete and Jen’s Backyard Birds is sold out.  Though I’ve managed to fill the void with beef, pork, and lamb from both Codman and Drumlin farms, I'm now dangerously low on stock.  I need local chicken.  I’m not picky: hens or cocks will do.  So, I followed the link.

Boy, was I in for a big surprise!

Comments

[Husband]

Unfortunately, this is not Tammy's first foray into pornographic mix-ups.

When we first bought our house, it required a lot of work: removing wallpaper, washing and patching the plaster walls, etc.

Tammy was very happy about the results of her hard work. I was in another room when I suddenly heard her exclaim, "I LOVE caulk!"

I peeked my head in and said, "Do you relize what you just said?"

...

[Tammy]

There's nothing like a little cock talk on a Monday morning.

[Bri]

I too can be quite...earnest. When I was a kid and Sade's Smooth Operator was on the radio every 10 minutes, I made the assumption that she was singing about a smooth telephone operator. Honest mix-up, yes? I had been hearing that song off and on for 10 or 15 years before I made the novel discovery that she was singing about something that had to do with a whole other kind of communication.
It would be really fun to mess with the mindless drones at Home Despot and ask them to show me their caulk.

[Bri]

Oh yeah, and good luck finding local chickens. Maybe you could talk to some of the vendors of your farmers market. Even if they don't sell eggs or meat, they may know of another source.

[Tammy]

Bri: Swear to god, when you brought up that song, I had the EXACT same image in my head. To this day, I envision a player at the top of his game, yet still working the phones.