I got an e-mail last week from someone offering to send me free samples of ice cream. My first thought was: SCORE!!! I knew this blogging thing would pay off, eventually. Then, I started to feel conflicted about whether I would be compromising the unwavering journalistic integrity of this blog. I haven’t finalized my policy for reviewing stuff (or started it, even, since no one ever asks for my opinion), but rest assured that when I do, I will ALWAYS find a loophole for ice cream.
So, let’s talk about the free samples that J.P. Licks sent me. Peach, mint, honeydew sorbet, and lemon sorbet are among their seasonal flavors this summer. To ensure a modicum of objectivity, I enlisted my two small children because they can’t be swayed by the almighty dollar. Everything’s free to them. Here’s what they thought:
The Preschooler: Wasn’t a fan of the honeydew. Thought the peach was okay. Really, really liked the mint despite the disappointing discovery that the dark flecks were not bits of chocolate, but rather mint leaf. Once that sunk in, though, he decided his new favorite was the lemon sorbet. And that it was, in fact, “the best ice cream he ever had.” He has since eaten the entire pint single-handedly, despite deciding halfway through that he should pick out the pieces of lemon zest one by one. (With the lemon sorbet now gone, he has started requesting lemon slices in his morning juice. If that doesn’t earn a spanking, I don’t know what does.) Winner: Lemon Sorbet. Runner-Up: Mint.
The Toddler: Since the preschooler wouldn’t share the lemon sorbet and someone else wouldn’t share the mint (???), the toddler had his choices narrowed for him. It may not seem fair, in this very scientific experiment I’ve set up, but trust me, it is. I didn’t have high hopes for either the peach or the honeydew passing muster because they taste like fruit and, as we all know, the toddler doesn’t eat fruit. Nevertheless, a clear favorite emerged. Winner: Peach.
Based on these results, it would seem that there is a two-way tie. Except that Husband and I totally disagreed with their conclusions, so we had to muscle them out of the way to set the record straight. Here’s what the adults had to say:
Me: I thought the honeydew sorbet was a revelation. It captured the ever-elusive, perfectly ripe honeydew flavor (not sickeningly sweet, yet not watery and cucumber-like, if you know what I mean). I liked it. However, it was the fresh mint that stole the show. I simply could not stop eating it, although the pesto-like flecks of herb left in your teeth are less than attractive. The lemon sorbet didn’t bowl me over, but far be it for me to argue with a 4-year old about such matters. Plus, it kept him out of my mint ice cream. As for the peach, it had an amazing texture, but I thought the beautiful flavor was too subtle. It would be perfect paired with, say, peaches. Winner: Mint. Runner-Up: Honeydew Sorbet.
Husband: I’ll cut to the chase. He’s really not a sorbet kind of guy. Winner: Mint. Runner-Up: Peach.
To make better sense out of the results, I devised a complicated scoring system by which you apply points to the winning flavors based on the age of the person who picked them (because, let’s face it, what do kids know?). Like I said, I’m anything if not fair. Here were the results:
1. Mint (winner)
4. Lemon (sorry, kid)
So, make haste to J.P. Licks before the summer is out. And bring (mint-flavored) floss.