Fee Fie Foe Fum

My tomato plants are out of control.  They have long since dwarfed me (not saying much), and are now towering over my husband (saying much, much more).  At this rate, I’ll be able to climb my tomato stalks and bribe my way into heaven by August.  Or is God cracking down on illegals, too?

See my little tomatoes?  They’re Caspian pinks, a Russian heirloom.  Look how cute and misshapen one of them is.  It’s all I can do not to eat it up this second.

All of the gardening books I skimmed said that the best plants for novice gardeners to start with are radishes.  Even children can grow radishes, they assured me.  Based on my experience, however, they were talking about expensively preschooled, genius children.  My radishes have no radish attached to them.  Just a skinny, radish-colored root.  They suck. 

Better candidates, I think, would be tomato plants.  From the looks of it, even a stem cell can grow them.  Or, at least, a stem cell that stumbled upon the perfect tomato-growing conditions completely by accident.  (Take that, stem cells.  You think you’re so smart.)

Are tomato plants supposed to be this gigantic?

Also, check out the roses (middle front row, and middle back row).  They totally rebounded, no thanks to me.  The brown leaves all fell off and by the time I got back from vacation, they had all new green leaves and some buds.  I guess the only one the roses had a problem with was me.

Comments

[Heath]

Wow. Those are HUGE tomato plants. Tomatoes hate me: perhaps because I never remember to plant them until like June. But everybody else gets these glorious bushy tomato plants, and I get little spindly sad orphan in the corner tomato plants.

I am envious! But I bought a book called "How to Grow More Vegetables Than You Ever Imagined in Less Space than You Thought Possible." I'm going to kick me some Mother Nature ass next year!

[Sally]

Holy cow! That's some big tomato plants you've got there little lady! And, what's up with the roses? Are those *dwarf* rose bushes? They're so teeny tiny. But, on the other hand, your rosemary looks really good. You rock Gardener Tammy!

[cookiecrumb]

Oh, they're going to get giganticker. You might even be sorry you planted them so close together.
Isn't this fun? Fake gardening. I know *I'm* faking it.
(I had the same "luck" with my dratted radishes last year. Feh.)

[Tammy]

CC: I was sorry I planted them so close together as I was doing it, but there was no stopping that freight train. I'm so sad about the radishes, though. We eat them faster than my farmshare can pick them.

Sally: Yeah, but my other garden is crap. I don't know about those roses. They're usually bigger than that, but they're probably feeling a wee bit crowded.

Heath: I like the sound of that book. Mother Nature better watch her back.

[OtherGardener]

Ha I'm probably such a nut posting this a year later but that was one TALL plant. And I was under the illusion that the roots 'were' the radish? Or so that's what I thought when I grew them a few years ago!