Again. But, unlike the last person to score my credit card number, who spent thousands of dollars at Louis Vuitton and Prada, this one spent a mere $400 at Old Navy. To that thief, I say, live a little. It’s not even your money. That’s the best you can do?
I was joking with the Old Navy people, asking what size the stuff was, because I’ve been meaning to do some shopping. Criminals tend to have better taste in clothing than I do, so I thought maybe I’d save myself some trouble by just keeping the charges on my account and having the stuff shipped directly to me. I’ve always wanted my own personal shopper. Especially one who splurges on Next Day Air.
Perhaps, she who stole my credit card number was the same person who broke into (and then locked me out of) my Yahoo e-mail account on the same day. I sure hope she enjoyed the reading. If I’m really lucky, she was busily sending out query letters to prospective editors, because I’ve really been slacking off lately. I hope she used the spell-check. I’ve always wanted my own personal query-letter writer.
Given that my particular identity (slovenly appearance, yet immaculate credit) is so attractive to criminal types, I really think I should be doing some kind of outreach. Because I have a lot of stuff I’d like to buy for myself, but I have trouble justifying the expense. Inserting a middleman might mean less guilt.
So, from now on, I’m just going to give out my credit card number to whoever might want it. Go ahead, people, knock yourselves out. I’ve had my eye on Global knives for years, and just about anything shiny and/or cheese-related from Williams-Sonoma.