I’m sure everyone’s been anxiously awaiting word on my rodent situation. So, here’s the update.
For weeks after the mouse sighting, I patiently awaited my offering. I’d heard this is common practice for a cat that loves its owner: to catch the invading mouse, and then proudly present it on the owner’s pillow like some kind of mixed-up tooth fairy. My husband and I had long doubted our cats’ hunting abilities, but I thought that maybe the threat of starvation would cause their instincts to kick in.
Since we have two cats, one of whom used to like me, I thought the odds were pretty good that I’d be receiving a little something, even if only by accident. Maybe not on my pillow, as the cats are too filthy to be allowed on the bed, but perhaps at the bottom of the stairs or something. Just a small token of thanks for feeding them once in a while and tossing some sand into a dark corner of the basement. Then, I’d chalk one up for the cats and subtract the five-dozen or so points that the mouse had surely accumulated during the cats’ extensive nap time.
But morning after morning, I’d stumble down the stairs only to find nothing out of the ordinary. Just the usual cat vomit on various rugs and couch cushions. A little “F you” for having kids and ruining their perfect lives. So, we had to call in the professionals.
When the cats gradually lost interest in the taped-off rodent corner of the house, we assumed we were in the clear. So, imagine our surprise when we found a small punctured mouse corpse on the living room rug last week. (UPDATE: two mouse corpses.) (Where there are two, there are 2 million. Excuse me while the reality of a full-blown infestation really sinks in…) (…Uh-huh, and here comes the vomit…).
There’s no way to confirm which cat was responsible, but I’m pretty sure it’s not the one who’s trying to bask in the glow of the achievement. Until I can figure it out, I have no choice but to take both striped and non-striped roast beast off the menu.
However, we are offering a special on day-old rodent. Any takers?