For one full year after having a baby, I’m completely useless to anyone but my children. I lose touch with friends, spurn all activities after sunset, become even more ignorant of current events. Are we still at war in Iraq? It’s like I go into a cave and don’t come out until my infant is a toddler. During this time, there's only one thing on my mind. Survival.
But once I get a taste of a full night of 100% pure sleep, I start to remember what I’ve been missing. Coming out of “the cave” is like a butterfly finally emerging from a cocoon of blood, sweat, tears, vomit, and my own coagulated breast milk to an endless vista of rolling lavender fields and grapevines. Or, in my case, the endless vista of traffic and strip malls that I have to pass on the way to where the food is. Ah, but it’s worth it, because when I finally leave the cave, I’m hungry. Damn hungry.
IS THERE ANYTHING TO EAT OUT THERE???